Scary Movie 3: A Hilarious Take on Blockbuster Flicks
The scariest part of watching “Scary Movie 3” wasn’t the film itself, but the guy behind me in the theater. He was laughing louder than the soundtrack, rocking back and forth, and leaning forward like he was about to lose his lunch all over the people in front of him. Thankfully, most of the audience was just chuckling along, even more so than during the first two installments. This time around, David Zucker took the director’s chair from the Wayans brothers, and that explains a lot.
The plot isn’t really the main attraction here; it’s all about the funny little details. But basically, Cindy (Anna Faris), our familiar face, is now a TV journalist dreaming of becoming as famous as Jim Carrey in “Bruce Almighty.” She stumbles upon a killer videotape that’s already claimed a couple of high school girls, making her the Naomi Watts of this story. Simultaneously, she discovers aliens in the countryside leaving mysterious crop circles for a widowed farmer (Charlie Sheen). The farmer’s younger brother, a wannabe white rapper in a hoodie, channeling his inner Joaquin Phoenix (Simon Rex), completes the parody of “The Ring,” “Signs,” and “8 Mile.” Throw in some jabs at “The Matrix Reloaded,” the ever-present Leslie Nielsen as the President of the United States, and cameos from Pamela Anderson and Queen Latifah, and you’ve got Zucker and the Wayanses having a field day with these mainstream hits.
I can’t say I even cracked a smile, maybe because my own imagination had already done a much better job of skewering “8 Mile” and “Signs.” Still, the fact that “Scary Movie 3” is taking on these films is commendable and refreshing, a balm for a film critic’s soul. There are two key points here. Unlike the earlier movies, this one targets mainstream movies rather than the somewhat obscure “Scream” and “I Know What You Did Last Summer.” Watching Zucker’s film, you can’t help but feel a bit of glee that “The Matrix,” which was taken so seriously by so many, is finally getting a well-deserved roasting, even in its own country. It proves that there’s still some sanity left in the world. Plus, by going after mainstream targets, the third movie has shifted its style a bit. The old, cheap summer camp humor has been replaced by something closer to British humor. It’s all played straight until a small, absurd detail breaks the facade. President Ford was a real person, and not that long ago. Zucker hung a portrait of President Ford in the White House, but not the one you’d expect.
Highlights and Lowlights
The “Ring” parody is the most fleshed out, “8 Mile” is simply rehashed, and “Signs” gets the best treatment. Maybe it’s because that particular piece of nonsense provoked the strongest reaction in me. It’s especially fun to watch Charlie Sheen play Mel Gibson, considering their apparent real-life rivalry, and the scene where he says goodbye to his half-crushed wife, pinned between a tree and a car, is genuinely funny. Zucker cast Sheen’s real-life wife, Denise Richards, in the role, and she’s not just crushed, but neatly separated into upper and lower halves. The visuals are spot-on. Gibson walks through the yard, just like in the original, saying, “Something’s wrong with the dogs,” while the dogs casually smoke a hookah. And the aliens are now friendly and pee from their fingertips.
The Architect from “The Matrix” is portrayed as a complete idiot, which is satisfying to watch. I think I finally smiled when the TV station security guard, after all the chaos, gets his hands on the computer that controls the news ticker and fills it with his own colorful vocabulary, which the clueless anchor then reads aloud. But honestly, most of the jokes are pretty childish. Pee-pee, poo-poo, snot in the ear, who threw up on what, and where the blood splattered.
So, “Scary Movie 3” is still not for those who appreciate wit, but for more indiscriminate fans of silliness. And trying to debunk nonsense with even more nonsense is hardly a novel approach.